My sister lives in in a condo in the Virginia Highlands neighborhood of Atlanta. Her upstairs neighbor, who also happens to be the president of the HOA, is a serious douchebag and, therefore, is always harassing her about something. Things that have twisted his panties into a wad include bikes on the patio, hosing off a car in the parking lot, and even a “noisy” ceiling fan. (Who the hell can hear a ceiling fan in another apartment?) But whenever he complains, he does so as the HOA president, and says that he is simply representing other douchey neighbors. Funny how no one else has ever complained directly to my sister, and the doucheking refuses to give any names. So when it came time for the most ridiculous complaint of all, he didn’t have the balls for an in-person confrontation. Instead, he left this cowardly, “anonymous” note on my sister’s door.

I, being the good sister that I am, wrote a response on her behalf, which she posted on his door the next day.

I’m just fighting the good fight against bored, narcissistic douchebags everywhere.